Help your children deal with disappointment

Source: Angelica Reina, senior extension specialist

We all know how it feels when someone swipes our favorite swing or we come in second in a contest we thought we should have no problem winning.

Unfortunately, disappointing events like these occur early in our lives and the lives of our children. Helping children learn how to channel their disappointment can actually help them develop emotionally, intellectually and socially and positively impact their future happiness and achievements.

When we see our children experiencing the sadness and frustration that comes with disappointment, our first reaction might be to coddle them, buy them gifts or respond negatively toward others who are the perceived source of the disappointment.

These are not the best responses, as they do not allow your child to figure out the reasons behind their disappointment and the steps they can take to not feel that way in the future.

Your child will look to you for a way to respond to these unpleasant feelings. While it may be hard, do not appear to be disappointed at the outcome in front of your child.

This may add to their disappointment, if they feel like they have let you down. Instead, talk to them about a time when you were disappointed and the steps you took to improve the situation. Let them know that everything worked out okay for you.

Encourage your children to view setbacks as opportunities for self-improvement and growth. Teach them that past outcomes of loss cannot be changed, only the way they respond to them in the future. Encourage them to figure out what went wrong and ways they can improve next time. Remind them that you believe in them and if they continue to work hard and improve they will probably reach their goals.

Also remind them that you will love them regardless of the outcome. This type of thinking and positive reinforcement can increase your child’s resilience, motivation and confidence and make them better equipped to deal with disappointment in the future.

While failure and disappointment are natural emotions experienced throughout our lives, teaching your children how to positively respond to these setbacks can set them on a course for success further down the road. You can get more information about childhood development topics at the Clinton County Extension office.

Educational programs of the Kentucky Cooperative Extension serve all people regardless of race, color, age, sex, religion, disability, or national origin.

Homemakers Night Out

Are you interested in an evening of education, fellowship, and hands-on fun? Then join us for our first Homemakers Night Out on September 17 th beginning at 5:00 p.m. at the Clinton County Extension Office. Refreshments will be served from 5:00-5:30 p.m. with the program beginning at 5:30 p.m. The topic will be the Mind-Body Connection with Make-it-Yourself Pampering Products. To RSVP, contact the Extension Office at 387-5404.